Morbid Cleaning

If you didn't know I came up with strange things before, you will now.

 Morbid Cleaning

Otis was defrosting the refrigerator, but unlike a normal person who gets ice chests to keep the misplaced items cool, Otis was using the mortuary’s coffins. It’s not like his uncle was going to be desperately searching for it. In the whole history of the mortuary, no one came running in, out of breath, and in short gasps of breathes said “I need (gasp) a coff (gasp) in (gasp) stat (gasp).” Although, if dying people were more considerate they would help out the living by plopping themselves into their eternal boxes before someone else had to do it. He should propose this to his uncle. Maybe he'd design a neon star-burst catchy sign that said "Fifteen percent off total bill if you participate in our 'self-help' program!"

The coffins made for great food containers. They were large, insulated and had a lid to trap the cool air. Actually, coffins really were non-electric refrigerators when Otis thought about it. He doubted people showcased children's art with business card magnets on top of coffins, but maybe that was niche he could cash in on. His mother would have freaked out if she saw what he was doing, but he figured that as long as he didn’t spill ketchup on the light blue padded satin interior, there was no reason to panic. Then again, what if he did spill ketchup? He doubted the next occupant would mind very much. 

The cat, Mr. Reaper, would sometimes try to hide in one of the plush corners for a snooze, but Otis would quickly shoo it out. He didn't want cat hair accidentally getting in the jello salad. Or to have to explain to his uncle why strange cat noises were scaring customers in the coffin show room. That would be a pretty funny prank to pull, thought Otis, but it could lead to the cat meeting his namesake.