The Ten Commandments

I wrote this in one of my companion's journals on the mission. She said I should post this on my blog as a list for all men to follow. I agreed.

The Ten Commandments (that the man that marries you must keep)
1. Thou shalt have no other woman before or after Rachel.
2. Thou shalt bow down to Rachel and love her with all their heart, might, mind and strength.
3. Thou shalt not take in vain communications from Rachel.
4. Keep each day as an honor to her. Every day thou hast been given to live within her presence. Thou, and thy money, and thy car, and thy attention and thy ass.
5. Honor and respect Rachel that thy days may be long upon the land.
6. Thou shalt not kill Rachel's hopes and dreams.
7. Thou shalt not commit adultery, especially if it begins with an S and ends with a tacey.
8. Thou shalt not steal or abuse Rachel's heart. His thumbs won't be the only things cut.
9. Thou shalt not bear false promises.
10. Thou shalt count thy blessings and consider yourself as probably the luckiest man alive as having Rachel as a wife. Others shall covet thy relationship.